I have an issue. It's myself. I've questioned God many times as to why He would make me the way I am. I'm an odd duck. Socially awkward- not shy! I have a contingency plan for almost everything, and a contingency plan or my contingency plan, and a contingency plan for the contingency plan's contingency plan, and.... You get it.
My mind is my greatest gift God gave me, but it comes with the strange personality quirks. I'm learning to love them. I have embraced many of them already.
I will not react to your distressing situation with feelings. I will have a logical response. I'm aware of this and have taken steps to try to remedy it. Usually, I remain silent. Many times, it comes across as insensitive. I never intend it to be that way. If I mean to be rude, you'll know.
I have impossibly high standards for myself. I know I will never live up to them, yet I have them all the same. I have high standards for you, yet not as high as my own, and have learned long ago you will never live up to them, either. Completely idealist and completely cynical. I believe anything is possible, yet don't believe people will try to be what they could be.
Odd. I warned you.
Curiosity is my driving force. I either love a subject or don't care about it. There is no in-between. If I love it, I will master it. Subject matter changes and fluctuates. Today is psychology, tomorrow may be French-inspired impressionist art. I never know what spark will lead to a flame.
I don't think in a linear way. A leads to B which leads to C. Boring.
I have several thought processes happening at once.
One is concentrating on what I see. I'm engaged in typing at this moment. I already know exactly how this is going to continue and I have already discarded the stuff that will not work. My mind has already finished this post. Now it's ready to move on to something else. Stupid slow fingers.
Another is thinking about tomorrow and all the possible scenarios that will be played out. Few things surprise me because I prepare for everything.
Another is making anagrams or other word games. Example: I didn't start the fire.
Die Hard Fitters Tint. A Drifted Sitter Hint. Ok... time to move on.... Daniest Tire Thrift. Really.... Darted Finite Thirst
There are about 10 thought processes. They overlap and intertwine into a huge messy knotted ball-like thing. Or not. It depends on what's going on. It's never straight, though. Boring.
My mind is so loud, I could never imagine how it would be silent. This is one of the reasons I don't like a lot of outside noise. I already have a lot demanding my attention.
I hate it when people say to stop thinking. It's insulting. I try to remember that people don't think like me. A-B-C. Boring.
